We are at the specialty long term care hospital in Provo now. Annette, Kris and I are here trying to comfort Clare. It is a balancing act that we are doing now. She is getting more agitated and responsive which is just what we want. She also appears to be in a lot of pain which we do not like. The nursing staff is balancing between giving her enough drugs for the pain, but not enough to cover up any progress she is making. I can't tell if her expression is panic or pain but it is probably a mixture of both. As she becomes more aware she will become very frustrated when she tries to make noises and nothing comes out. As long as she in on the ventilator, no wind goes over her vocal cords. We have to restrain her because she pulls and pushes on everything.
All of the signs are positive. It is just hard watching her. Clare thrashes in bed and looks like she is in terrible pain, but we know this is what needs to happen and continue to happen as she continues to make progress.
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